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Monday, September 24, 2012

The hustle and bustle...

Wow! I can’t believe it’s been over 2 months since my last post. So much has been going on and I have been so busy I just haven’t gotten around to filling you all in.

School started again, which means I’m back to work. For the first time in a few years I’m back to work full- time. I used to have Fridays off which was a nice reprieve for me. Being an introvert (and a busy single mom), I’ve savored those Fridays by myself while the kids were at preschool to get my chores done and wall myself off from the world to have a little alone time. It gave me a chance to decompress from the hectic work week and recharge for the weekend with the kids. Now that I’m back at work I literally don’t have a moment to myself except when I’m in the shower or commuting to work. The rest of the time I’m pulled in what feels like a million directions being a full-time single mommy, daughter, friend, co-worker, and partner. It’s been disconcerting for me to not have my down time to recharge. My brain and emotions get overwhelmed being in the presence of others all the time and I have to actively practice patience with others, and with myself. I’ve been overwhelmed with trying to balance getting all the things done around the house that need to be done while still being an active and engaged mom on the weekends. I used to be able to devote my time and attention to the girls on weekends because I had Friday to focus on errands and chores. Making it even more difficult is the fact that my boyfriend started a new job and now he works long hours on the weekends, which doesn’t leave us time to have fun together. So I’m back to feeling like a single mommy all the time…

Another big change has been the “official” addition of my boyfriend to our household, and the adjustment of living with someone who’s not young enough for me to make all the rules for! My boyfriend’s children moved to a different city at the beginning of the school year. This was, and continues to be a very difficult adjustment for him as he no longer gets to see his children as often as he wants to. But since he doesn’t have them every other weekend anymore it has allowed us a chance to try living together on a trial basis. I’m happy to say it’s been a really smooth transition and when his lease on his apartment is up in about a month he will officially move in here. Though ironically, we actually spend less time together now even though he’s living here, because he’s always working on the weekends which is when we used to see each other the most. We’re happy to be taking the next step in starting a life together, but it feels bittersweet to not have his kids be a part of it with us. I felt like I had just started to get in a groove with them and develop a good friendship, and then they moved. It’s been a big adjustment for us both to realize they will not be as much a part of our lives as we want them to be.

To top it all off, I’ve added a huge project to my plate. I bought a vacation home in Costa Rica and every spare second lately has been devoted to getting the needed renovations done so that I can have it ready to rent out by the first of the year. Renovating a house from a different country has been quite an experience, and has taken a ton of my time and money! I will travel down there two more times before the end of the year to get everything done, and it all seems ridiculously exciting and overwhelming at the same time.

So my life has been crazy, and busy, and fun, and complex, and emotional lately…but it’s all been worth it!