I'm in Costa Rica with my best friend and my beautiful daughters. We are here for a month; something that seems both extravagant and yet absolutely necessary as a way to escape many of the stressful things I have been focused on for the last few months. It's beautiful here, and the people and the culture are renewing to the spirit. There is a joy they exude in their daily lives despite how simply they live. A happiness that settles in your bones when you realize you can be happy with so much less. A friend told us of a survey recently published in which Costa Rica was rated number 1 of the happiest places to live. It is easy to see why and get lulled into the idea of leaving all of your old life behind and starting over here. Afterall, the country's motto is Pura Vida: the pure life. It really seems like a little slice of heaven here.
Strangely we left on the 2 year anniversary of his death and somehow when I booked the flights I didn't make the connection in my head about the date. But now I think I might make it a yearly tradition to be here on the anniversary. It's peaceful, and calm, and restorative. It's the closest to heaven I can get...la pura vida.
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Thursday, June 28, 2012
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Lucky
Today is Father's Day. In years past this day has made me profoundly sad for the loss of my own father and for the loss of my childrens' father. But for some reason today I don't feel sad. Perhaps it's because I just spent an entire weekend with all of my extended family. Today I feel lucky.
Lucky that there are many men in our lives who are wonderful father figures to me and my girls, and who provide excellent examples of what it means to be a great father. Numerous uncles, cousins, and friends, my phenomenal father in-law, my brother, my brother in-law, my boyfriend...I feel lucky to witness the love all of these men have for their children and families. I feel lucky that my girls have so many wonderful examples of active fathers who love, protect, and provide for their families.
I feel lucky that I even have a reason to celebrate this day. I feel lucky that I get to reflect on what an awesome father my dad was while he was here. I feel lucky that Andie and I got the chance to have our own beautiful children together and I get to remember the complete adoration he had for them. I feel so lucky and incredibly blessed that my girls and I have so much love and support surrounding us not only today, but every day.
Lucky that there are many men in our lives who are wonderful father figures to me and my girls, and who provide excellent examples of what it means to be a great father. Numerous uncles, cousins, and friends, my phenomenal father in-law, my brother, my brother in-law, my boyfriend...I feel lucky to witness the love all of these men have for their children and families. I feel lucky that my girls have so many wonderful examples of active fathers who love, protect, and provide for their families.
I feel lucky that I even have a reason to celebrate this day. I feel lucky that I get to reflect on what an awesome father my dad was while he was here. I feel lucky that Andie and I got the chance to have our own beautiful children together and I get to remember the complete adoration he had for them. I feel so lucky and incredibly blessed that my girls and I have so much love and support surrounding us not only today, but every day.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
In honor
This past Sunday was the 2nd Annual Triple A 5k run in honor of Andie. We had a phenomenal turn out and raised money for the Guadalupe County 100 club, an organization that provides support the the families of fallen officers. It felt so good to give back to the organization that helped me so greatly in the weeks after Andie died. I am honored to be able to know the wonderful men and women that dedicate their time to this organization. We did a balloon release at the end and sent our balloons "to heaven to see Daddy." It was emotional but also heartwarming and I felt a sense of peace throughout the day. I know he'd be happy that we were celebrating him instead of mourning him.
On Monday, the 2 year anniversary, we will board a plane for Costa Rica. I cannot believe that two years have already flown by. I am looking forward to being in a place away from the normal hustle and bustle of our lives where I can focus and reflect on how far the three of us have come in the past two years. So much of the hurt and pain has been replaced with laughter and love. I'm excited to get away from our lives here for a little bit and have the opportunity to live an adventure, relish in my children, and remind myself what really matters in life.
On Monday, the 2 year anniversary, we will board a plane for Costa Rica. I cannot believe that two years have already flown by. I am looking forward to being in a place away from the normal hustle and bustle of our lives where I can focus and reflect on how far the three of us have come in the past two years. So much of the hurt and pain has been replaced with laughter and love. I'm excited to get away from our lives here for a little bit and have the opportunity to live an adventure, relish in my children, and remind myself what really matters in life.
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