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Monday, September 27, 2010

100 days, and 100 nights...

Yesterday was the 100th day without Andie. It's getting harder not easier, I feel crazier not saner, and so it goes... A book I'm reading says that grief doesn't come in stages, it comes in waves and cycles- I have to wholeheartedly agree.
You go up and down within an emotion and then move through it, and just when you think you're alright you cycle back around and start all over again. Shock, denial, anger, depression, acceptance- the 5 stages of grief...yet I manage to hit them all at least once a day, sometimes more. Sometimes I move through very quickly and other times I wallow in it. I cry almost every morning and every night but somehow manage to push through the day.
"Push" is my new mantra- I have to push myself to keep going, I have to push through the tough times, I can push through it all one moment at a time...I will push through it.

1 comment:

  1. Brooke,
    I hope you can find comfort in the word of the Lord when you are feeling overwhelmed with the stages of grief. One verse that comes to mind is Matthew 11:28 (New International Version):

    "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." It is okay to feel all that you are feeling. Give those feelings to God and know that He will hold you through it all. Hugs!